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21 More Dating Truths We Need to Realize

Thought Catalog

1. Every rejection isn’t a life-altering setback. If you didn’t get crushed every once in awhile, it wouldn’t mean as much as when it does work out. You need to take the bad with the good, so you can learn from it and be a little wiser next time.

2. People have other priorities that aren’t you. Sometimes when he says he can’t to hang out this week, it doesn’t mean that he’s too busy for you or has forgotten you. It’s that he values other things in his life as much as he values you — like his friends and his family. Personally I like dating someone who has other things going on, but it’s hard sometimes not to take that personally when we live in fear that he’s not into us. Be patient. If he’s into you, he’ll call you after he hangs up with his mom. If…

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The One Person You Never Really Get Over

Thought Catalog

There will always be that one person you’ll never really get over. I know, I know, Connie Chung delivering groundbreaking news over here, but it’s true. Sure, you can go days, weeks, months, years without thinking of them but the second you see their face or their name gets mentioned in passing, your stomach drops and you feel like you could puke. You’ve lost control and all of these feelings suddenly rise to the surface to say, “Sup? Have you missed us?’ You’ll hate yourself for this, for all of it. You won’t be able to recognize why this one person can still garner this type of reaction. Why is your mind punking you? It almost feels like a betrayal. You want to give your emotions a stern talking to and say, “Um, hi. I thought we were over this? So why am I getting super nervous and spazzy at…

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You Need To Take Control Of Your Life

Thought Catalog

You are a powerful person. No one ever knows what they’re capable of until something happens that forces them to rise to the occasion. And then a natural high starts to wash over their body and they realize that they haven’t been living up to their full potential. They can achieve so much more if they just tap into their inner Sasha Fierce.

It’s easy to go through this life letting bad things happen to us. It’s easy to lay in bed all day, feeling vaguely depressed, picking at the wounds. (You never stop picking scabs. This habit always stays with you.) By giving other people power though, we’re taking it away from ourselves. We’re letting someone come in and twist us violently around their finger. Then we act surprised when, after the closeness fades and the body turns cold, we get upset. We feel empty. We let someone…

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21 Dating Truths We Need To Realize

TRUTH. and for reference hahaha

Thought Catalog

1. 95% of the time, they didn’t lose their phone. They didn’t drop in the toilet or the bathtub. It wasn’t shut off. They just didn’t want to text you. If not, why aren’t they Facebooking or tweeting you right now?

2. If you’re looking at someone’s online dating profile and there are multiple people in their photo and you say, “Who is that guy? He’s hot!”, the person will never be that guy. He will always be the person standing next to that guy.

3. No one’s ever “too busy” to hang out with you. Lots of busy people still date. Taylor Swift makes time for a new boyfriend every other day.

4. Everyone is allowed to make the first move. We put so much emphasis on seeming detached and unavailable until the last possible moment, worried we might scare them off by actually seeming interested. What if, heaven…

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16 Reasons He’s Not Asking You Out

omg yes hahahaha

Thought Catalog

1. You’re intimidating. Yes, you are. You don’t give him any kind of sign that you’re interested or you give him mixed signals and he is in a state of confusion.

2. He just got out of a bad relationship and he does in fact want to be single for a little while before he gets back in the game.

3. His life is a little too complicated right now and he’s being a good guy and not bringing you into it until he figures a few things out.

4. He thinks that you just see him as just a friend.

5. He sees you as just a friend.

6. He’s moving across the country or abroad in a few months and doesn’t want a long-distance relationship.

7. He is not over his ex.

8. You pretend that you don’t like him. In fact, when he’s around, you act like he doesn’t even exist…

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Before Someone Loves You, You Must Love Yourself


Thought Catalog

Someone is going to touch your hand in a dark movie theater where a scary movie is playing but you can’t remember a single thing that happened in the story because you are too busy concentrating on your own breath and how close this person is to your body. They are going to reach out and touch you and it is going to feel like a thousand needles pushing into your skin at once, the kind of pain which is as much a thrill as it is an object of fear. You are going to forget how to breathe, how to look normal, how to pretend to be the person you were only a few seconds ago. And it will be good, but it won’t be love.

I dated a guy for a time who was very nice. We’re used to the descriptor “nice” as having become almost a euphemism…

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6 Ways To Deal With Rejection

for future reference. hahahaha

Thought Catalog

1. Avoid the person who rejected you like the plague, at least for a little while. Having to face someone who just rejected you the next day or maybe even the next hour is some kind of sick, twisted, torture. Call in sick, walk an extra mile out of your way, find a new favorite café – I don’t care, just plan on being, “extremely busy” for the next couple of days or for the rest of your life. Whatever. Out of sight, out of mind, right?

2. Take a social media hiatus. You probably stalked the living day lights out of the person who you were/are interested in. Well, rather than haunt their social media accounts for reasons or especially one reason (See: Other person they might be dating.) just get off of it altogether for a period of time. Social media can be painful enough without having to be…

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How To Get Friend Zoned

oh god. hahahaha

Thought Catalog

Dear People of the Internet,

I write this for you after approximately eight years of (accidental) research. In fact, one might even call Justfriendistan my region of social expertise. I will happily write the converse of this article, “How To Not Get Friend Zoned,” if and when I manage to figure that out. In the meantime, I present to you 16 simple steps, that, if followed correctly, will leave you to suffer slow heartcrumble as you convince yourself that being their friend is better than nothing.


1. Use the word “dude” (“bro”, “bud”, and “homie” also come to mind) liberally. This is one of the fastest and easiest ways to score a touchdown in the friend zone. Note: if you are already being referred to by the Object Of Your Affection as “man” or anything equally chummy, read no further. You’re already in the friend zone. It’s okay, on…

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I Don’t Love You Anymore

Thought Catalog

Saying that about a friend used to really scare me but now it doesn’t. I don’t love you anymore: it’s a fact and it’s not even cold or hard. It doesn’t scare me anymore because it’s just the truth. I don’t love you anymore. You and I are cut.

Relationships are something I’ve always been bad at but friendships are something I’ve always been proud of. I never really thought a friend could do something I wouldn’t forgive them for, something I wouldn’t be there to pick up the pieces after, anything we do to fuck things up with the people we care about the most. Platonic love has always felt stronger than romantic love because that’s what constructs our core. You had no selfish reasons to put up with my fuck ups but you put up with them anyway because you loved me and I loved you back.


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How To Accept What You Can’t Change

Thought Catalog

1. Start with moving toward accepting who you are. If you do some analyzing, you’ll find that most problems are, one way or another, rooted in not accepting and loving yourself. This is the best place to start.

2. Don’t rely on ineffective coping mechanisms, find healthy outlets for yourself. For example, suppressing your feelings and ignoring the problem will never bode well for you in the long term, and you know this.

3. Make lists, write things out, consider the possibilities. This is how I deal with mostly everything I can’t figure out immediately. I write things down, make lists and weigh pros and cons. For the sake of acceptance, write down why you can’t change it or the reasons why you may be happy this happened in the future.

4. Don’t try to change everything at once. You won’t do anything thoroughly if you try to uproot your…

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